More Coffee, Please

Stray Thoughts: Reflections From The Lighter Side Of AdServices

If there’s a better way than coffee to get going in the morning, I haven’t found it.

My day doesn’t officially begin until that first cup passes my lips, chasing the cobwebs and splicing together the bits and pieces of my mental junkyard. Coffee helps me quickly hone in on important facets of the day ahead, like whether it’s a Tuesday or a Saturday, where I’m expected to be at what time, and if I should be wearing pants or shorts.

The perks of drinking coffee are impressive. Consider this:

– A well-timed cup of coffee has been proven to spike cognitive function and elevate productivity for an hour or more. So when you need to rise to the occasion and make things happen, chugging some java can take you to a whole new level of personal achievement. This explains the morning I ran 5 miles, detailed my car, built a guest cottage in my backyard, and helped police solve a string of robberies. All before 9 a.m.

– Coffee is the nonalcoholic drink of choice to manage and survive time-consuming situations and tedious discussions. Going into a meeting with your company’s head of Fiscal Discipline and Cost Containment? A 16-ounce Colombian blend can speed up the ordeal, especially when you slip out to the restroom 20 minutes in and murmur ambiguously over your shoulder, “In case I don’t see you have a nice weekend.”

The benefits and advantages of coffee are almost too numerous to mention. Besides, the fun is in the flavor. As I write this, in fact, I’m savoring a rousingly robust mug of Second Cup Paradiso Dark. It’s bold and kicky, with full-bodied intensity, slightly smoky notes, and hints of cocoa. It’s good to the last drop, and by “drop” I mean that moment where I actually let go of the cup in a fit of coffee-induced euphoria.

Jealous of my bliss, some misguided coffee critics say that too much caffeine is not good for you and can make you jittery. B-b-b-b-bull, says I. D-d-d-d-on’t give me t-t-that. They don’t know b-b-b-beans about my b-b-b-beans,

Now where was I? Oh yeah. Barista, more coffee, please. And where is your men’s room?

Alan Williamson
Senior Copywriter
AdServices Inc.


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