Attention Holiday Shoppers: My Flea Market Treasures Are Yours For The Taking

Stray Thoughts: Reflections From The Lighter Side Of AdServices

The holiday shopping season is here, and the search for mind-blowing gifts at budget-babying prices can take you to places you normally wouldn’t go near. For me, something about flea markets triggers strong, foreboding feelings.

To really enjoy the flea market scene, you have to have an abiding faith in the existence of a great and glorious bargain. What’s more, you have to believe that such a bargain will reveal itself only to those who renounce the comfort and order of civilization and wander nomadically through a vast wilderness of castaway merchandise. Call me a cynic, but I’m not buying it. And while I’m at it, I’m also not buying the following.

  • The $5 Power Tool Accessory Kit with 49 screwdriver and drill bits made from recycled paper clips.
  • The $12 Three-CD Boxed Set of The Skyliners Greatest Hits, a late 50s group who had one big hit, Since I Don’t Have You, which leaves 2.9 CD’s of filler.
  • The $20 luggage that looks like Samsonite, feels like Styrofoam, and wheels like a portable hot dog steamer.
  • The $25 running shoes with the brand name logo on the outside and the paper-towel cushioning and dead raccoon aroma on the inside.
  • The $10 Lucky Bamboo Plant whose mystical powers seem unable to bring you the minimal good luck necessary to get a decent cup of coffee at the flea market or prevent the guy in the Expedition from expe-dinging your car door in the parking lot.

Fortunately, there’s been no talk in my house this year of going to a flea market to buy holiday gifts, so I’m cautiously optimistic that I’m in the clear.  But if you go, I wish you luck, stamina, and an eye for a great buy.

Speaking from experience, $19.99 for a Greek Fisherman’s Cap with a sound chip that makes seagull noises when you shake your head is money well spent.

Alan Williamson
Senior Copywriter
AdServices Inc.


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